I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
