Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
