it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
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