So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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