I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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