I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
