BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize