Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
