I just cut my nipple shaving
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
