Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
