Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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