I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
