just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
third nipple confirmed
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
