It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
