apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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