I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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