What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
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