And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
