I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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