i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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