Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
