Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
