I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
