It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
