she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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