You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
