i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize