i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
