the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize