some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
