I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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