she was so not down for the gang bang
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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