it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize