The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize