Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
