I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
