Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
