have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I have feelings that need drinking.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
