Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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