these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
