I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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