He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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