That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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