i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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