So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
