What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Randomize
