He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
