brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
