Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
