yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
